When "good" prayers aren't answered

We've heard from many of you at home that your Sunday School classes, school classes, friends, and church groups are also praying for us. We see that many visit our blog. This means that we have a lot of prayer support. You'd think that with so many people praying that God would answer our good prayers! So far, though, we are still stuck in Bangladesh despite daily prayers from all of you to bring us home. Kalina's packages continue to arrive late, leaving us without proper supplies for her. Nadeem and I have both suffered with health issues this week even though I prayed for our health for months before we left home.
Yesterday we got some shocking news from my mom. All this time we've thought that the fingerprints were in Texas for processing because that was the news from the senator's office. Apparently there was a misunderstanding. The lady processing our case said she would send them, so the senator's aid assumed that she had. Instead she held onto them in Atlanta for two weeks and just now sent them.
How do you respond to situations like this? This just happens to be our story, but all of us have had many times when our good prayers haven't been answered. I cannot begin to claim that I have anywhere close to total understanding. God's ways and thoughts are not ours. I do want to share some insights that God has given me over the past few years.
In one of his books, Neil Anderson talks about the difference between goals and desires. He defines a Godly goal as something that reflects God's purpose for your life and does not depend on people or circumstances beyond your ability or right to control. God's goal for your life is character development-for you to become the person God wants you to be-looking like Him. On the other hand, Godly desires (our good prayers), although good on the surface, may or may not be fulfilled.
Even God has desires and goals. He desires that all come to Him and have eternal life ("He is not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance." -2 Peter 3:9). Of course that is good! We all want that, too! However, we know the reality is that not everyone will come to God. One of God's goals is to cast Satan into the abyss and for Jesus to return again. Nothing will prevent this.
In the Bible, Job's desire was to avoid pain and suffering and have his pleasant life restored. God's goal was for Job to know Him more intimately and value Him above all these things. ("I have heard of You by the hearing of my ear, but now I see You with spiritual eyes." -Job 42:5) Martha's desire was for the healing of her brother, Lazarus. God's goal was for people to see His glory as Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. Jesus' desire was to avoid dying on the cross. God's goal was for us to have the gift of forgiveness of sin and eternal life.
For many years my desire was to be a mom. I wrestled over and over with this unanswered good prayer. I thought maybe God was mad with me or maybe I wasn't doing enough for God or maybe God didn't care. After a while I lost hope and decided that this wasn't God's plan. I can tell you that my desire was never to adopt a child. Nadeem and I wanted our own biological children. My desire was never to travel to Bangladesh. My desire certainly wasn't to be here for two months and still counting. My desire is to avoid pain and have my happy plans work out. However, God's goal is to make me who He wants me to be and to show His glory so that people will believe in Him and follow Him. Sometimes that comes through pain.
Does having some understanding make the journey easier? Not completely. Nadeem and I struggle immensely every single day (sometimes every single hour) that we're here. For me I have to focus on the truth of God's Word. I have a stack of scripture cards where I write the verses that God gives me and I keep reading them over and over, thanking God for what He has said. I also journal a lot. My journal doesn't sound particularly "Christian." Parts are embarrassing as I tell God that I quit, that I've had it, that I don't know why He's not helping me, and on and on.
It took me a long time to get to the point where I could wrestle with God about issues. I thought that wasn't right to question God. However, Job and David give us models in the Bible to show that it's okay to work through tough questions with God. One of my favorite authors, John Eldredge, wrote about how he spent a year away from church and just sitting outside, not even reading the Bible, after his best friend died tragically. He was with God, but he had to work through a lot of questions and anguish.
I think it's so important to talk to God when good prayers aren't answered and stay with Him until you find peace. If you were angry or hurt with a person here on earth, hopefully you would go to that person instead of telling others how upset you were. Others can't resolve the problem. In the same way, go to God and tell Him about what's happening. Nadeem and I have plenty to tell God lately! He's faithful and always gives us some comfort or peace, usually not complete understanding, but by His grace, enough to move forward in faith.
I want to conclude with some encouraging news. My mom said that the senator's aid has promised to stay on top of the case. He has explained how urgent the need is for us to return home. Part of the reason for the delay was because there is one man in Texas who handles the processing of the paper fingerprints. The lady in Atlanta had to make sure that he was in the office and ready to receive our prints. She FedEx'd them straight to him. The senator's aid believes that we will receive our approval this week. It only takes maybe an hour to actually process the fingerprints.
May we be like Abraham who "against all hope, in hope believed." (Romans 4:18) We serve a mighty God. His goal will be accomplished! His promise will be fulfilled! He will deliver us home!